Remembrances
by Astro
Summary: This is my first completed songfic. The G-boys meet again after Libra's destruction and think about all that's happened.


# Remembrances

  
Original Song: "Close My Eyes"   
by Mariah Carey

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Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or anything associated with it.  
All copywrites belong to their respective owners...

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Heero walked slowly through the large, deserted hanger, listening to the sound of his footsteps echo dryly off the walls. Pausing, he looked up at the walkway high above. In his mind's eye, he could still see Wing Zero, dominating the empty space of the hangar. With all the destruction that he and the other gundam pilots had caused during the war, it seemed that Shinigami was not the only bringer of death. 

Turning his mind away from the memories, Heero again began walking toward the other end of the hangar. The large door used for moving mobile suits was open, providing him with a view of the ocean and the soon to be setting sun. As his eyes adjusted to the brightness, he was surprised to see Duo already there, looking out over the waves. 

Without a word, Heero stepped beside the other pilot, who was leaning on a rail that fenced off the area. At first, he kept his gaze straight ahead, silently awaiting an outburst of some sort from the other, but when Duo remained silent, Heero cast a glance at him. His brow crinkled when he realized that Duo's expression seemed uncharacteristically grim. "Duo?" he said uncertainly. 

Duo let out a long sigh, his head bending over his hands clasped over the rail. "I'm sorry, Heero. I just got to thinking, about the past and all that's happened." 

In understanding, Heero's own expression grew a little more grim as he contemplated all that had happened during the last year. Leaning over the rail next to the long haired pilot, Heero focused his gaze on the waves crashing against the concrete wall below them. 

Turning his head, Duo considered his comrade for a moment. When it came to life experiences, they really were a lot alike. 

_ I was a wayward child  
With the weight of the world  
That I held deep inside  
_

"You ever wish life could've been different, Heero? You know, have parents, and a home...a family?" Duo's voice grew distant and wistful, causing Heero again to look up at him. For a moment, Duo could see all the pain in Heero's eyes, unveiled for the first time. Duo was taken aback at the sight; it was almost like looking into a mirror; but Heero's pain seemed to run far deeper and reach farther back into his past than Duo's. 

_ Life was a winding road  
And I learned many things  
Little ones shouldn't know_

The moment was brief, however, and Heero's eyes glazed over with their usual, unemotional look. Duo blinked, almost wondering if what he had seen was real or imagined. 

Heero looked back at the ocean, this time concentrating on the horizon. The sun, which had been caught behind a cloud, suddenly burst forth, bathing the pair in warm, yellow light. 

_ But I closed my eyes  
Steadied my feet on the ground  
Raised my head to the sky  
And though time's rolled by  
Still I feel like that child  
As I look at the moon  
Maybe I grew up  
A little too soon_

From behind them, they became aware of another set of footsteps echoing through the hangar. In a moment, Trowa appeared on the other side of Duo, his gaze also focused on the ocean. Apparently, memories surrounding the hangar's use had affected him as well, for the usually quiet pilot seemed a little depressed, even for his standards. "Hey, Trowa," Duo droned, sounding more tired now than sad. 

For a moment, the trio merely stood in silence, gazing at indiscriminate objects in the distance, held together by their mutual experiences. 

_ Funny how one can learn  
To grow numb to the madness  
And block it away_

Speaking almost to himself, Trowa voiced the thoughts on his mind. "You once told me to act on my emotions, Heero. And even though that goes completely against the way I've lived my life up until a few months ago, I've tried to follow that philosophy. Because otherwise, a person can grow as cold and heartless as those mobile dolls." 

Heero turned his gaze toward Trowa, but it was Duo who spoke. "I just don't understand why so many people had to die." Calming himself, Duo hunched further over the railing, letting out an exasperated sigh. Under his breath, he spoke quietly. "Wars are just so pointless..." 

_ I left the worst unsaid  
Let it all dissipate  
And I try to forget_

The sun sunk lower in the western sky, and from behind a cloud, the moon suddenly became visible, a ghostly shade of white against the blazing sky. As if in sync with each other, the three turned their heads toward the moon. Duo reflected back to a night shortly after he had reached the Earth, seeing the full moon for the first time. In some ways, he seemed so much younger then... 

_ But I closed my eyes  
Steadied my feet on the ground  
Raised my head to the sky  
And though time's rolled by  
Still I feel like that child  
As I look at the moon  
Maybe I grew up  
A little too soon_

Again, the sound of footsteps was heard within the hangar, but this time, two strides could be distinguished. The trio turned around, greeting the equally sullen faces of Quatre and Wufei. They all knew that Wufei was still dealing with Treize's death, and Quatre was still recovering from his encounter with Dorothy. 

Quatre raised his head and caught sight of the moon as the clouds flitted around it. Without willing it to, his gaze drifted to an open expanse of sky. He immediately thought of the colonies that lay beyond the moon's orbit, and unwanted memories flashed into his brain. First, was on board a shuttle, pleading with his father only to be caught up in they array of fire that had killed him. Then, the explosions turned into those caused by Wing Zero, and he again saw an innocent colony destroyed by his hands. Out of that image appeared another, that of a single body floating lifelessly in space... 

The memories became too painful for him to bear. Tearing his gaze away from the sky, his eyes began to sting with tears. 

_ Nearing the edge  
Oblivious I almost  
Fell right over_

Trowa could guess the thoughts that were plaguing him, reaching forward to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Quatre raised his eyes at the touch, and Trowa gave him a small smile. "Don't worry, Quatre. We've all been through a lot in this war. But we've gotta keep moving forward." 

Wufei, whose gaze had been fixed on the ground, raised his eyes to look at Trowa with a mixture of skepticism and defeat. He was responsible for killing Treize Khushrenada, who in the end had only wanted peace for the Earth and the colonies, just as they did. How could he reconcile himself and move forward after such a deed? 

_ A part of me  
Will never be quite able  
To feel stable_

Looking up at the setting sun, Wufei walked over to join the others at the railing. Taking a deep breath, he let the sounds of the ocean waves calm his thoughts. Quatre walked over to the railing as well, and soon all five pilots were staring out over the ocean. "Man, you just don't get this kind of view in the colonies," Duo stated. "Everything up there seems so limited, ya know? But here on Earth..." 

"It seems like you could go forever over that horizon," Quatre finished. After the statement, they five stood in silence, each taking in the view before them. The setting sun lent its golden color to both sky and water, giving the scene a surrealistic feel. 

_ That man-child falling inside  
Was on the verge of fading  
Thankfully I  
Woke up in time_

There was something magical about the moment. It was a time for rebirth as the Earth moved toward a more peaceful era. Staring out over the water, each of the pilots knew it was a time of rebirth for them as well; they all needed to let go of their "kill or be killed" state of mind and prepare for life as ordinary citizens, living without the interruption of war. They no longer needed to be the guardians of the world. Feeling the warm sun on their faces reminded them that they were still alive, and they still had a lot of life left to live. 

_ Guardian angel  
Sail away on an ocean  
With you by my side  
Orange clouds roll by  
They burn into your image  
And you're still alive  
(You're always alive)_

They knew the road ahead would be turbulent, but they wouldn't give up, not after coming so far. They needed to let go of their pasts so that it wouldn't control them, yet remember what had happened so that it wouldn't be repeated. It was time to move on... 

_ But I closed my eyes  
Steadied my feet on the ground  
Raised my head to the sky  
And though time's rolled by  
Still I feel like that child  
As I look at the moon  
Maybe I grew up  
A little too soon..._

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End file.
